Before I leave town for a week’s vacation with family in Florida, followed by a week with friends in Missoula, Montana, I wanted to stop by and tell you that I’ve had a breakthrough. I am not fixed; my life is still not perfect, but I now have better understanding of myself and my “issues.”
The Introvert Advantage has helped me realize what I’ve suspected for three years but couldn’t articulate, though simple as it is.
I am an introvert, and as such I focus inward to recharge my batteries. Being a stay-at-home mom means I’m focused externally nearly every hour of the day. Answering questions, preparing food, changing diapers, watching, playing, and answering questions (again). The activity, noise, and constant touch of little bodies are unceasing. My energy is zapped.
That’s it. That’s what drags me down more than anything and makes me feel like I’m constantly running on fumes–always having to be external when I don’t just want, but need, time to curl up inside myself, to stare at a wall and think deep thoughts. And I need a lot of that time.
I have no solution for how to bring more of this into my day, but identifying the problem is a start. It feels good. I already feel like less of a nutjob than I did last week.
OK, that’s all. Carry on.